Bird Lessons

The temperature was predicted to hit mid-90s today, so I decided to protect my outside potted flowers by giving them all a hefty drink first thing this morning.

As I was watering the pots in the backyard, a wren was serenading me so beautifully from somewhere nearby. Don’t we all love the melodic sound of the tiny wren? I always marvel at how much sound comes out of that little bird body.

As I was refilling my watering can in the kitchen, she alighted on the deck rail right outside my screened deck door and continued singing her little heart out. What a blessing that little bird and her sweet melody were to me as I went about my backyard watering chores.

With a smile on my face and in my soul thanks to momma wren, I headed out the front door to water those pots. I have some kind of blackbird who has built a nest deep in my lilac tree right outside the front door. I’ve heard the tiny peeps for a week or so now. But momma bird was not happy with me!

I was greeted with horrific, angry squawks as I finished up watering my front flowerpots. In an instant, this enraged, protective bird turned my sunny, wren-influenced disposition into one that wanted to shout, “Oh, give me a break! I’m not out here to hurt you. This is MY yard and MY tree. Give it a rest!”

You’ll be glad to know that I didn’t actually have that conversation out loud, but it did run through my head. I had to chuckle to myself when I realized how quickly my attitude changed from the back door to the front door. All because the “conversation” went from sweet to crabby.

Hmmm…might there be a lesson in here for us all? Especially during these trying times.

Granted, there is much in our world today that makes us want to squawk like the angry blackbird. The pandemic and its isolating effects have caused many of us to turn a bit grumpy, myself included. Add to that the widespread civil unrest and protests turning violent that grieve so many of us, and it’s a wonder we can sport any kind of sunny, wren-like disposition.

Most of us are familiar with the old adage, “You can attract more flies with honey than vinegar.” Or a very loose translation – we can have more friends and better relationships if we are more like this morning’s wren and less like the blackbird.

We are living in a day where strong opinions exist on so many different fronts. It doesn’t take much for a conversation to deteriorate into a shouting match with neither party hearing the other. So often my first reaction when someone challenges me, especially angrily, is to fight back. You saw my earlier conversation with momma blackbird.  Enough said.

So, how do we have productive conversations with friends, family, co-workers, or even demonstrators? With the honey/vinegar adage and momma wren in mind, here are some suggestions:

• Acknowledge up front that not everyone will agree with you, or see things from your perspective.
• Realize they could be right!
• Listen with an open mind to those with differing opinions.
• Hold your tongue if someone reacts angrily to an opinion you’ve expressed.
• Strive for a sweet, wren-like disposition as you discuss difficult topics.
• Smile and change the subject, or walk away if things get heated.

Because every single one of those suggestions is so hard to do in our own strength, ask God to give you that peaceful spirit as you engage in potentially contentious discussions. It’s advice that I must take to heart as well. Be the momma wren.

A soft answer turns away wrath,

but a harsh word stirs up anger.

Proverbs 15:1