I must admit I can’t say that phrase without immediately starting to sing “We Are Family” by Sister Sledge from the 70s. Just another earworm compliments of yours truly!
Recently I’ve tried to “up my prayer game” a bit because it seemed I was missing certain prayer requests or neglecting some of the larger, more global issues.
So, I now have a prayer guide that lists suggestions for each day of the week. It’s truly been helpful in bringing more intentionality to my prayer life.
On Tuesdays, I’m encouraged to pray for:
• Spouse, children, grandchildren, extended family
• Healing of strained relationships
• Protection and salvation of loved ones
• Healthy friendships and mentors
It’s an important list, but as I look at bullet point #1, I’m always reminded that there’s not much left of my family that falls into that category. And that often causes just a little heart stab—a longing for days gone by when I had a decent-sized extended family.
Whenever I tell someone that I really don’t have a lot of family – which is magnified during the upcoming holidays – I often follow that with the admission that it’s sometimes not all bad! (See bullet point #2.)
I’ve always been grateful for the incredible friends God has blessed me with – including those I’ve met because of my grief ministry. Walking a similar road of loss can quickly solidify a relationship.
So, I’ve generally skipped past the first bullet point pretty quickly and moved on to the others. But last week, I felt a little nudge from God to open that particular door.
Where he led me wasn’t toward asking for prayers over family I don’t have. He knows my circumstances better than anyone. Instead, my mind drifted back to early childhood.
I had great parents who loved me unconditionally and gave me a solid foundation on which to build my faith. Honestly, when I look back on those years, I have nothing but good memories. Oh sure, there were the occasional misunderstandings and hurt feelings, but nothing that tainted the overall picture of my growing-up years.
And if that wasn’t enough, God blessed me with an amazing husband who also loved me unconditionally and gave me over 35 of the best years of my life. Not perfection, but a deep, abiding awareness of how truly blessed I was to share my life with him.
While these kinds of prayer list prompts can stir a sense of sadness and loss, what I realized that morning is that, despite those who are no longer here, I can be eternally grateful for the impact they had on my life for so many decades.
Yes, it’s vital that we pray for those whose lives we currently share – for blessings or for challenges (!) – but let’s not forget to look back on the precious memories of how God blessed us in the past.
Maybe your life story is flipped around. I know many who do not have pleasant memories of their growing-up years. Some dealt with abuse or addiction or chronic health challenges. Not everyone got a “Mayberry-like” childhood. What then?
Can you still find blessings in the life God has given you today? Like me, do you have even a few friends who bring joy and laughter into your world? Do you have a better home life now than you did years ago?
With the holidays right around the corner, family does come more sharply into focus. Those gatherings can be much anticipated or greatly dreaded. At best, it’s complicated.
God is aware of every nuance that makes up the fabric of your family and friend relationships. He knows where the struggles are, but he also knows how to direct your heart toward the ways he has brought blessings into your life.
I would encourage you, as I encourage myself, to notice the areas that easily bring a smile to your face – whether they are in your home or your world today or have been gone from your life for years. That smile means you have something—and someone—to be grateful for. Have a blessed Thanksgiving!
You make known to me the path of life;
in your presence there is fullness of joy;
at your right hand are pleasures forevermore.
Psalm 16:11
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