By Thom Vines, guest author

On September 2, 2008, our twin daughters, seniors at Lubbock-Cooper High School, were returning home after basketball practice. A 40,000 lb. dump truck veered into their lane. Kelsey was driving. She was killed instantly. And, thus began the worst nightmare of our lives.

It’s been a full decade since that horrible day. Many tears have fallen, many sleepless nights have been endured. And yet, hope lives on: hope through Jesus Christ.

A few years ago, a movie was released, entitled, “Collateral Beauty”. It starred Will Smith and a gaggle of other A-listers. It centered on a man (Will Smith) who lost a child. I admit that it was difficult at times to watch. The significance of the title is that even in the worst of times, there are unexpected circumstances of “beauty” that come along with the tragedy; opportunities for growth, if you will. Opportunities to see God at work, and then perform the single greatest act of faith there is: trust Him when you do not understand why (trusting when you do understand requires a whole lot less).

One of Kelsey’s favorite verses was Proverbs 3:5. The second part of that verse is, “…and do not lean on your own understanding.” After she died, we were tested in living that verse. It was not easy. It was a constant struggle. It essentially took me two years to accept it. I think it is one of those turning points and moments of truth in every grieving process. I know it was for me.

It’s probably a good thing that I didn’t see the movie in the first few years after Kelsey was killed. I was not ready. It would have probably made me angry. I would have probably been yelling at the screen something like, “How dare you…”

What allowed me to see the movie in a different vein was spiritual growth that the Lord fostered in me. I came to see that Kelsey’s life was God’s gift to us, a gift that lasted eighteen years, and the best part, a gift that we would receive again (for a whole lot longer than eighteen years).

It is often said, that when you go through great loss you either get better, or you get bitter. Well, God’s love, and the hope earned by Jesus Christ, kept us from getting bitter. This does not mean that the pain is over, that there are no more tears; that the grief is over. Every day brings what I call a, “Kelsey moment.” Holidays, birthdays and anniversaries are still extra tough. They are not as bad as they used to be, but you never fully get over losing a child. That’s just the way it is.

So, we take one day at a time, and we look for the twinkles of “collateral beauty” God sends to sparkle around us. They are there. Somedays they are brighter than others, but God never leaves us.