“I have no idea what to say to him.”

“I don’t want to make things worse.”

“I’m afraid I’ll make her cry.”

“I’m afraid I’LL cry.”

“I don’t want to bring ‘it’ up.”

“I’m just not good at this.”

…said almost everybody at some point in their lives.  Someone in your circle of friends or acquaintances just suffered a major loss in their lives and you’ve got nothin’.  Oh sure, you might be able to muddle through the visitation and/or funeral and say a few short words that you hope are marginally comforting.

But then, you just want to get back home into your OWN comfort zone.  Sorry they’ve gone through this, but someone else is better equipped to be their support.  You don’t know how to help them.  And besides, you need to get back to your own life issues.  You’ll pray for them…

This is a scenario that plays out time and time again across our lives, leaving in its wake hearts forced to take on even more pain, above that of the loss they are grieving.

How do I know this?  I’ve been on BOTH sides! 

For sure, I’ve said or thought every one of those first statements and more.  I’ve sighed a sigh of relief when I got out of that funeral home. I’ve disappeared from the lives of people who were hurting.  And…I’ve felt guilty for it.  But not enough to really change my behavior.

How did I get to the OTHER side of this situation?  Enlightenment began on January 1, 1992, when my dad died very unexpectedly.   I experienced firsthand the stark difference between friends who never contacted me, and friends who contacted me DAILY.

My position on this new other side was firmly cemented after my husband of 31 years passed away in October 2017.

Two truths became abundantly clear to me. 

• The deeper the loss, the less people wanted to step into it with me. 
• For those who DID step in, the depth of our friendship grew exponentially!

So, my simple question to you is this, “If someone could teach you how, wouldn’t you want to be that blessing in someone’s life?”  And just a little bonus – it will bless you back!

My prayer is that I can supply exactly that for you.  Not just the “how tos” but also the biblical “why fors.”  Practical advice that can give you the right motivation and the tools to go with it.

I’d love it if you’d share this blog site with your friends.  I believe they will thank you for it!

Let’s get started!